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You know you’re a runner when…

How do you know when you’ve become a runner? Well, in all honesty, it probably isn’t after completing your first run/walk session and collapsing on the sofa swearing that you’ll never do that again (we’ve all been there, it gets easier!) But once you’ve got into the habit of regularly lacing up your trainers and heading out the door – to run/walk, jog, bimble or run like all Hell’s demons are after you – you can safely call yourself a runner. It’s not about how fast you run, how far or how many races you’ve completed – if you regularly go out “for a run”, you have my permission to call yourself a runner.

However, in case you’re still not sure whether you qualify, check this handy list of tell-tale symptoms and see how many apply to you (more than 5 and yup, runner!)

1: You know how many miles there are in a marathon (including the all-important .2)

2: You own more pairs of trainers than most teenage boys

3: You aren’t afraid to use the word ‘fartlek’ in polite conversation

4: ‘Mileage’ refers to your training totals, not the car

5: Half the clothes in your wardrobe are made of Lycra or wicking fabric

6: You know what DOMS stands for

7: Your GPS running watch has more computing power than the international space station

8: You run around the carpark/block to round up your run to an acceptable mileage (though, that might just be me!)

9: You know the distance from your house to various local landmarks off by heart

10: It’s perfectly normal and acceptable for you to have blisters, chafing and black toenails (and to talk about them over dinner, post pictures on Facebook etc.)

11: Hi-vis is not work-wear but an acceptable clothing choice

12: You spend more time on Strava than Facebook etc.

13: You don’t go out drinking on weekends because you’re running the next day

14: You put the word ‘only’ in front of mileage when someone asks how far you ran – “Only a half marathon”

15: You don’t recognise your running buddies when they’re not in running clothes

16: You’re not afraid to do a ‘wilderness wee’ if necessary

17: You hoard safety pins

18: You check out other runners’ form, footwear, and kit whilst running

19: Stopping for traffic/pedestrians/acts of God annoys you as it messes up your pacing (and your time on Strava)

20: Losing a segment crown on Strava is an almost physical pain

21: If it’s not on Strava (or RunKeeper etc.), it didn’t happen

22: Hills hurt but they look great on your GPS graphs afterward – major bragging rights!

23: You’ve no medical experience but are familiar with technical terms like Plantar Fasciitis, Achilles Tendonitis, Illiotibial Band and Cruciate Ligament and have injured at least one of these in the past

24: An injury is not as painful as not being able to go for a run

25: The weather is atrocious but it’s still not enough to put you off going for a ‘short run’

 

Got any more? Feel free to add your own in the comments…

About the Author
Mummy, runner, red wine lover. Prone to blisters and sarcasm. Take all my posts and witterings with a pinch of salt.
  1. Phil Ballard Reply

    Ha ha ha, excellent! There are one or two more that come to mind:

    – You know the location, brands stocked and opening hours of every sports shop in 50km, but have no idea about your local supermarket
    – Having your watch lose satellite lock during a run is a personal tragedy on the scale of a natural disaster. You may need therapy to get over it.
    – You routinely have to return to the laundry basket to recover gels, barcodes, your spare house key, safety pins, locker tokens, unused sticking plasters …

  2. SarahB Reply

    Oh yes, the dreaded GPS fail… a true first-world tragedy!
    I thought of another:
    – ‘Deep heat’ is your signature scent 🙂

  3. The chairman Reply

    All your Memory photos on Facebook are pictures of you and your friends either before a run, running or after a run!

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